


Look At Me.

by thatfatcat4



Category: Six of Crows Series - Leigh Bardugo
Genre: Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Arguing, Begging, Blowjobs, Bottom Kaz, Choking, Cum Swallowing, Degradation, FaceFucking, Finger Sucking, Hair-pulling, Hand Jobs, Homophobic slur usage, I just want to see kaz put in his place alright, Light Dom/sub, M/M, Masturbation, Mirror Sex, Multiple Orgasms, Name-Calling, Overstimulation, Plot What Plot/Porn Without Plot, Praise Kink, Smut, more people need to be mean to kaz, they share a bed, this isn't very canon compliant
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-01-08
Updated: 2021-03-05
Packaged: 2021-03-12 14:47:38
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 14,990
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28637232
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thatfatcat4/pseuds/thatfatcat4
Summary: Jesper has finally found a way to take Kaz down a notch whenever his cruel personality becomes too much.
Relationships: Kaz Brekker/Jesper Fahey
Comments: 29
Kudos: 53





	1. Look At Me.

**Author's Note:**

> They're aged up in this so it isn't weird

"You know, Kaz," Jesper hissed through clenched teeth, "I'm getting really tired of the way you treat us." 

Kaz studied Jesper for a moment. He was standing in the doorway to Kaz's room, his arms crossed, his fists clenched. Kaz looked at him, boredom apparent in his coffee-brown eyes. He begun to laugh.  
"Oh, you're tired of the way I treat you?" He cackled. "Aw, that's cute. I should throw you out onto the streets." He was still laughing, but there was a sharpness behind his words that was unmistakably threatening. He was serious, but so was Jesper.  
"You're a real piece of shit, you know that?" Jesper spat.  
"Leave a note in the suggestion box," Kaz said, gesturing towards the garbage can. "and get out of my room."  
"I'm not in your room." Jesper said. He was, infuriatingly, correct. He was technically in the doorway. Kaz rolled his eyes.  
"Jesper, does the word 'stupid' mean anything to you?"  
"Oh, probably." Jesper muttered, mainly to himself as he stepped into the room and closed the door behind him.

Kaz gave Jesper his full attention, turning in his chair to face his body towards his.  
"What the hell do you think you're doing?" Kaz asked, eerily calm, which was not exactly something Kaz was known for.  
"You're a horrible person." Jesper told him.  
"We're all terrible, Jesper. It's just a matter of who's willing to admit it, and who spends their entire life trying to escape themselves."  
"God, you're so fucking pretentious!" Jesper exclaimed. Kaz blinked in surprise.  
"Excuse me?"  
"You never shut up about how terrible people are, and how everybody is rules by greed and selfishness. Have you ever considered, Kaz, that it's just you?" Jesper stalked closer, watched Kaz like a hawk. 

Jesper may have had the upper hand, but Kaz was still dangerous. He wouldn't think twice about cutting this conversation short by putting Jesper down for a surprise nap, courtesy of his cane to the side of his head.  
"I could have you dead in less than thirty seconds." Kaz warned, narrowing his eyes. Jesper stopped in front of him, and took notice of the way Kaz was practically shrinking in on himself, trying to discreetly prevent their knees from touching.  
"Oh, I'm sure you could," Jesper taunted, resting his hand on the back of Kaz's chair and leaning over him. "but you don't seem as keen on killing me as you want me to think you are."

Jesper was right. There was no bite behind Kaz's words. They fizzed with a nervousness Jesper was unused to hearing from Kaz, but that was all there was. Anxiety and gravel.  
"It must be hard to portray yourself as the leader when you're this fucking spineless." He spat. Kaz wouldn't look him in the eyes, instead focusing his attention on Jesper's chest.  
"Hey," Jesper snapped his fingers in front of Kaz's face. "look at me." 

If it was anyone besides Kaz, Jesper would have grabbed his face and forced him to look up. But this was Kaz, and as much as Jesper loved to see him crumble, he didn't want to risk him fainting. He wasn't planning on touching him in any way that wasn't necessary. 

Kaz was, shockingly, obedient in Jespers demand. He looked up, meeting his eyes, and Jesper let himself marvel at the sight. Kaz Brekker trembling beneath him, his eyes wide and his breath shallow.  
"Holy shit," Jesper muttered beneath his breath, stealing a glance at Kaz's crotch.  
"Fuck off," Kaz muttered, crossing his legs.  
"You're getting off on this, aren't you?" Jesper teased, laughing mockingly at the man beneath him.  
"No!" Kaz shouted defensively.  
"Oh, sure. You're hard for some other reason, then? Perhaps you accidentally let your mind wander to torturing people?" He taunted. "Saints, and I thought I was the fag between us."  
"Fuck off!"  
"You sure you want me to? Your body is saying otherwise."  
"My body is wrong. As much as you wish for otherwise, Jesper, I'm straight."  
"Oh, sure," Jesper laughed, wrapping his fingers around Kaz's tie and giving it a good tug.

The sound that left Kaz's mouth was as unfortunate as it was embarassing.  
"Who would have guessed you were a bottom?" Jesper laughed. He let go of Kaz's tie and backed up.  
"Stand up." He ordered.  
"No- no, get out."  
"Aw, come on, you know you want to." Jesper said mockingly. Kaz gave him a glare that should have been able to turn him to stone, then, slowly with the help of his cane, stood up.  
"What now, genius? Want me to get on my knees and beg?" Kaz hissed. That... was not the insult Kaz seemed to think it was.  
"I mean, if you're offering-"  
"No."  
"Fine, strip."  
"What?"  
"You heard me. Don't make this harder for yourself, Kaz. You'll only embarrass yourself further." Jesper told him.

Kaz was quiet for a moment. It was a threatening silence- a silence in which Jesper didn't know if Kaz was going to murder him in cold blood or not. After a painfully long time of Jesper staring at Kaz, and Kaz staring at the floor, Kaz started to unbutton his waistcoat.  
"Good boy. You're good at following orders."  
"Don't push it." Kaz snarled as he dropped his waistcoat onto the floor. His tie followed, then his shirt. 

Unlike in the prison, Jesper let himself look. His eyes trailed the harsh lines of Kaz's body, taking in every detail from his pale skin to the line of hair from his pants line to his bellybutton.  
"Pants too." Jesper reminded him. Kaz sucked in a sharp breath, then removed his pants clumsily. It was probably difficult to do with a bad leg, Jesper thought.  
"Saints," Jesper muttered, staring at the much more apparent bulge in Kaz's underwear. "do you have a license to carry that thing?"  
"I'm going to fucking kill you."  
"Killing me before you get off just seems like a bad business move to me." Jesper retorted. Kaz rolled his eyes and crossed his arms over his chest self-consciously.

Jesper looked at Kaz for a long time before he spoke again.  
"The bed," he said, his eyes locked on Kaz's crotch. "get on the bed." 

Kaz was still for a tense moment before doing as Jesper said. He sat down on the edge of the bed, and looked at Jesper. He watched him closely, studying his every movement.  
"What are you going to do to me?" He asked when he couldn't take the suspense anymore. 

The truth was, Jesper didn't know. He didn't think he would get this far.  
"Give me your gloves." Jesper requested, his voice a hint more gentle than it was before. Kaz looked scared. More scared than Jesper had ever seen him. Jesper has seen Kaz scared and vulnerable before, but not like this, and he wanted to show Kaz that he could trust him.  
"Why?"  
"So I won't touch you." Jesper told him. Kaz took off his gloves, his hands trembling, and handed them to Jesper.

Jesper watched Kaz's hands as they settled onto the bed at his sides, gripping the sheets tightly. Jesper had the urge to tell Kaz how beautiful his hands were, but he fought it.  
"Lay down." Jesper instructed as he put on the gloves. They were warm from Kaz's hands, and the insides were damp, showing that Kaz's palms had been sweating. 

Kaz slowly let his back settle on the mattress. His legs still hung over the sides, but that was how Jesper wanted it. It would make touching him without touching anything he didn't need to be touching a lot easier.  
"Are you okay?" Jesper asked Kaz. He knew it was a stupid question, and that Kaz was not going to answer, but he thought maybe it would make Kaz a bit less nervous.  
"This isn't a fucking sharing circle. Just get it over with." Kaz growled. 

Jesper grabbed the band of Kaz's underwear and slowly begun to pull them down. He had seen Kaz naked before, but not like this. Not alone on a bed beneath him, with his cock so hard Jesper could practically see it throbbing. 

When Jesper had pulled Kaz's underwear down far enough to release his dick, it sprang upwards so hard it hit him in the stomach with a thwack. Kaz gasped and flinched, then glared at Jesper as a short laugh escaped his mouth.  
"What, you've never had that happen before?" Jesper asked. Kaz shook his head. Jesper would have described the gesture as innocent, had it not come from Kaz Brekker.

Jesper spat into the palm of his hand, onto the glove, and ignored the annoyed noise Kaz made about Jesper spitting on his gloves. 

He took Kaz's cock in his hand, and gingerly began to stroke him. Kaz lifted a hand and covered his own mouth, his eyes wide.  
"What, never had your dick touched before?" Jesper teased, not expecting Kaz to nod.  
"You're a virgin." Jesper immediately said, surprised. He knew Kaz didn't like being touched- but he thought- he had just assumed-  
"Is there something wrong with that?" Kaz asked defensively.  
"No, no," Jesper replied. "It's just gonna make this a lot more fun." 

Jesper quickly discovered that Kaz was very sensitive.  
"Ah, fuck- watch it, would you?" Kaz whined as Jesper prodded at the head.  
"If you keep squirming I'm going to have to hold you down." Jesper warned, then laughed when Kaz's eyes went wide. 

Jesper didn't know how much longer he could last jerking Kaz off without touching himself. As it turns out, it wasn't very long, as the second Kaz started to buck his hips upwards, effectively fucking Jespers hand, he couldn't take it anymore.  
"You're a virgin but you're desperate like a whore," Jesper told Kaz, who glared at him in response. "What, don't like that name? What would you prefer? Brat, fag, slut-"  
"Stop fucking talking."  
"Aw, you're so kind," Jesper cooed sarcastically, then took the glove off of his unoccupied hand using his teeth and threw it at Kaz. "Suck on the fingers."  
"Why?"  
"Unless you want me to shred your insides, I'd recommend doing as you're told." He threatened. Kaz, very reluctantly, put the tip of the glove's index finger in his mouth.  
"Oh, I know you can do better than that," Jesper scoffed. Kaz glared at him before sucking the whole finger in his mouth.

Jesper was quick to take his own cock out and started touching himself, taking notice of the way Kaz stared at his dick, wide-eyed.  
"Like what you see?"  
"It's huge," Kaz told him, then realized what he had said and glared at Jespers face.  
"I know," Jesper said. "Maybe one day you'll let me put it inside you."  
"Absolutely not."  
"We'll see. Keep sucking." 

Kaz did as he was told; something he was shockingly good at doing when he wanted to. He coated all the fingers in his saliva, then looked up at Jesper timidly.  
"Is that enough?" He asked, showing Jesper the glove. He sounded like a scared boy afraid of being scolded.  
"Probably," Jesper said, accepting the glove from Kaz. 

Jesper momentarily took his hand away from Kaz's aching cock, and chuckled at the way Kaz desperately thrusted his hips upwards with a whine, begging to be touched again.  
"If you're that desperate why don't you touch yourself." Jesper suggested.  
"I- I-" Kaz tried, then stopped.  
"What, have you never touched yourself before?" He asked, not expecting Kaz to reluctantly nod.  
"Seriously? Never?"  
"No- well, not really-" he admitted, flushing a deep shade of red.  
"Have you ever cum before?"  
"I- yes! That's a stupid question!"  
"I don't know, you sound pretty defensive about it." Jesper teased. "I don't think you have. Maybe that's why you're so uptight; you're frustrated."  
"Fuck off."  
"Aw, look at you, eighteen and you've never cum before."  
"I've cum before!" Kaz tried to shout, but it came out as a whine. Jesper just laughed at him. 

Jesper put the spit covered glove on his hand, and watched Kaz's face twist into shock as a finger was pressed against his hole.  
"Fuck, Jesper- wait-" Kaz whimpered, so desperate he grabbed on to Jespers wrist.  
"Hey, hey- it's okay, I'm not going to hurt you," Jesper reassured. He went to caress the inside of Kaz's thigh, but stopped himself. Instead he grabbed Kaz's hand, which was gripping onto the sheets so tight it looked like it was trying to strangle them, and guided it to his cock.  
"Wrap your fingers around it," he instructed. One thing he never thought he would do was teach Kaz how to masturbate, but here he was. Kaz got the hang of it quickly, and seemed to relax as he stroked himself. 

"I'll be gentle, I promise," Jesper whispered gently as he pressed his finger against Kaz's hole just a bit harder. He looked Kaz in the eyes as he kept pressing, until his body accepted his finger and it slipped inside. Kaz's face shifted to discomfort, but he stayed quiet, seemingly focusing on touching himself to distract from the intrusion.  
"Try to relax," he told Kaz as he moved the finger in and out in a painfully slow pace. He wanted to fuck Kaz's throat hard enough to hear him gag, then fuck him senseless using his spit as lube, but he settled for the gentleness of one finger. He took whatever he could get, Kaz's nervous expression as he took something inside of him for the first time being enough to make up for the lack of touch.

Kaz let out a grunt when Jesper's finger pressed into something inside of him.  
"Right there?" Jesper asked, pushing another finger inside and pressing that spot again. Kaz let out a moan- a real, high-pitched, whiney moan, and nodded his head.  
"Yes, fuck- there, right there-" he groaned.  
"Say please." Jesper demanded, now only touching the space below it. Kaz glared at him.  
"Seriously?"  
"Beg or I won't let you cum."  
"Jesper-"  
"Fucking beg."  
"P-please, please- I need it, Jesper," Kaz whimpered reluctantly.  
"Not very convincing." Jesper sighed, and started to pull his fingers out.  
"No, wait- I'm sorry, please- fuck, I need it so fucking bad, please-" Kaz begged desperately. Jesper hadn't realized how easy it would be to make him beg.  
"Good boy, you're so obedient," Jesper praised, choosing to ignore the disgusted face Kaz made. 

Jesper pressed a third finger inside and swatted Kaz's hand away from his dick, instead choosing to pump him in time with his thrusts.  
"God, I want to fuck you so bad," Jesper muttered, watching himself finger-fuck Kaz.  
"I couldn't take it," Kaz whimpered. "Your dick is too big."  
"Now you're just trying to be nice. Are you close?"  
"Yes- fuck, Jesper, I'm so close-" Kaz moaned. His head kept rolling back, despite his want to watch Jesper touch him.  
"Do you think you deserve to cum?" He asked.  
"Y-yes- yes, please- please Jesper, I need it- I need to cum so bad, I want to cum-"  
"Beg me to let you cum."  
"Please let me cum, please- pl- ah! Oh my god, oh my god it's so sensitive, Jesper please, please I need it so bad-" Kaz begged, predictably squirming whenever Jesper touched his swollen head. 

Jesper decided to give in to Kaz's pleas. As much as he loved making him beg and threatening to not let him cum, he knew his threats were empty. He wouldn't be able to live with himself if he didn't get to see Kaz cum.  
"You better say thank you when I make you cum," Jesper warned, squeezing Kaz's cock so hard he yelped. "understand?"  
"Yes! Yes, I understand- fuck, Jesper-" he moaned so loudly Jesper was terrified someone else in the building would hear. 

Kaz fucked Jespers hand so fast Jesper considered pinning his hips down, just to calm him down. But he didn't, he let Kaz fuck his hand and massaged his prostate with his three gloved fingers until his moans were almost unbearably loud.  
"Fuck, Jesper- I'm gonna cum, I'm gonna cum- you're gonna make me cum!"  
"Then cum, you desperate little whore," Jesper gave his permission, and as soon as he did, Kaz was a sobbing mess with his own cum spurting out onto his chest.

Jesper pumped him through his orgasm, then continued to do so long after his peak was over. Kaz squirmed hard, kicking and sobbing as he was overstimulated.  
"You didn't say thank you." Jesper scolded, furiously pumping Kaz's sensitive cock.  
"I'm sorry! I'm sorry! I'm sorry! Fuck, thank you, thank you, thank you! Stop, please- I can't take it anymore! It's too sensitive!" He sobbed, squirming furiously to no avail. Jesper finally let go, and pulled his tired fingers out of Kaz's hole.  
"Th-thank you, fuck-" Kaz whimpered.  
"Move over. Put your head here." Jesper instructed, patting a space on the side of the bed.  
"Why?" Kaz asked.  
"Because I'm gonna cum on your face, now move before I overstimulate you again."

Kaz did as he was told without arguement. He laid still while Jesper jerked himself off borderline violently above him, looking him in the eyes as he did so.  
"Open your mouth." He demanded. Kaz opened his mouth, and only grimaced a bit as Jesper's cum spurted out onto his tongue.  
"Swallow."  
"Do I have to?"

Jesper started reaching towards Kaz's cock. Kaz got the hint before he got there, though, and reluctantly swallowed Jesper's cum.  
"You're such a good boy when you want to be." Jesper told him.  
"Fuck off." Kaz barked, crossing his arms and looking away.  
"Ah, so you're only good when you want something." Jesper observed. 

Jesper tucked himself back into his pants, then contemplated if it was best to leave or not. Kaz wouldn't look at him, and he didn't know if Kaz was angry, or if he was just being Kaz.

Jesper started towards the door, but he changed his mind last second, instead stopping at the barrel of water and grabbing a damp cloth.  
"The fuck are you doing?" Kaz snarled as Jesper walked back over to him.  
"Cleaning up your mess, if you don't mind." Jesper said, showing Kaz the cloth. He sighed and uncrossed his arms, giving Jesper the closest thing to permission he was ever going to get.

Jesper wiped the cum off of Kaz's chest and stomach, then wiped the few stray drops off of his face.  
"Better?" He asked.  
"Yes," Kaz muttered angrily. "thank you." 

Jesper threw the cloth on the floor, unsure of what to do with it, and watched Kaz, who was still making a point of not looking at him.  
"I wish I could kiss you." Jesper admitted. Kaz looked at him through the corner of his eye.  
"No one's stopping you." He grumbled.  
"Are you serious?"  
Kaz shrugged. He didn't know what he wanted. He just knew he wanted Jesper. 

Kaz turned his head towards Jesper, and he let himself be kissed for the first time in his life. It seemed strange to get his first handjob before his first kiss, but he was always a run before you walk kind of guy.


	2. Give Me My Glove Back.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kaz and Jesper have an encounter in a bathroom.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> three cheers for kazs perspective babey

Kaz had been avoiding Jesper for the better part of a week. Ever since their last... encounter, Kaz found that Jesper had become more of a distraction than an annoyance, and he was entirely bitter about the change. He much preferred to keep his head straight, do his work, and keep others at arms length. He didn't want Jesper to be an exception; although, he supposed it was a little late for that, wasn't it?

Kaz wasn't sure what he was more scared of; the others finding out he was capable of having feelings, or confronting his own sexuality. He didn't think he was gay, but then again, a straight man wouldn't let another man do the things Jesper did, and a straight man certainly wouldn't enjoy it.

A heterosexual male would not lay awake every night after the fact, thinking of every name he was called and how good it felt to be degraded, trying to resist the urge to touch himself. Kaz didn't want to like being degraded. He was ashamed of himself for finding pleasure in the one thing he never wanted to be; vulnerable. Submissive. He hated Jesper for introducing him to these things, and he hated Jesper even more for how badly Kaz wanted to grab him by his shirt collar and drag him up to his room, just so he could demand Jesper do it again.

"Kaz?" Jesper's voice rang in his ear, startling him out of a daze.  
"Yes, what? What do you want?" Kaz hissed, hoping his skin didn't flush red with embarrassment. He contemplated taking Jesper out with his cane, but he figured that might be a tad bit dramatic, and it would only raise further questions.  
"Nina told me to give this to you." Jesper shrugged, holding out an envelope towards Kaz. 

Kaz snatched the envelope out of Jespers hand and shoved it into his pocket.  
"Oh, great idea, Jes. Wave the damn thing around for everybody to see!" Kaz hissed. Jesper gave him a goofy grin in reply.  
"Someone's uptight. Anything I can do to help?" Jesper offered. To others, it may have seemed innocent. It may have even been innocent, but Kaz couldn't risk those words being uttered in the barrel. He could barely risk them being said behind his closed, locked door. He shot Jesper a glare that likely would have killed him if Kaz had Grisha power.  
"Jeez, I was only-" Jesper started, but he was cut off as the side of Kaz's fist collided with his stomach. He doubled over, which only made things worse for Kaz, as Jesper collapsed right into him.  
"For saints sake, I barely touched you." Kaz spat, shoving Jesper away, trying to hide his panic at the physical contact behind anger. 

Kaz didn't want to storm away like a moody teenager, but in the end, he was a moody teenager, and that was exactly what he did. Storming away was exceptionally hard given his bad leg; but he managed. He could only hope nobody (Jesper) followed him. 

Kaz managed to make it to the bathroom, collapsing against the door as it closed behind him. He was annoyed that Jesper talked to him, annoyed Jesper gave him an envelope of jurda in front of everyone, and he was exceptionally annoyed that Jesper had the audacity to ask if Kaz needed help with being uptight. What the hell was he implying? Did he think Kaz was gay? 

Kaz wanted to be angry that Jesper had the impression he was attracted to him, but even he couldn't argue that Jesper's thoughts were unjustified. Maybe I need someone to give me a good kick in the jaw, Kaz thought, but he knew that wouldn't work. He's been kicked in the jaw plenty of times, often by but not limited to: Jesper. 

Kaz took his gloves off, placing them delicately on the counter next to the sink, and turned the water on. He had gotten indoor plumbing installed with part of his kruge, although the water didn't run hot. It didn't really matter to him, though; cold water to the face was perfect to combat how hot his skin had gotten. 

Kaz had been so occupied listening to the sound of the water running, he hadn't noticed the bathroom door open. It was only when he looked up and saw the reflection in the mirror, he realized Jesper had entered. 

Kaz genuinely thought he must be coming down with something. Maybe he had a flu or something. How had he not heard the door? Was he losing his head? He glared at Jesper through the reflection.  
"You know, normally people knock before they enter an occupied bathroom. What do you want?" He spat.  
"You had quite the freak out. I wanted to see if you were okay." Jesper told him.  
"Oh, bullshit." Kaz declared, spinning around to look at him. He leaned against the sink to put as much space between him and Jesper as possible, which, unfortunately, was only about three feet. 

Kaz didn't think Jesper really wanted to make sure he was okay. He didn't believe anyone would ever want that. Kaz was the bastard of the barrel; he didn't need to be comforted.  
"Look, Kaz-" Jesper tried, taking a step forward, but stopped when he noticed Kaz recoil back. "Saints, man, what happened to you?"  
"What?" Kaz demanded. He couldn't believe Jespers audacity.  
"You just- you know. Normal people don't act like you do."  
"I'm not normal people. Now, would you leave me be? I have things to do."  
"In a bathroom?" Jesper cocked one eyebrow, and Kaz resisted the urge to deck him. 

Jesper was taller than Kaz, and normally Kaz wasn't all that aware of the height difference; but now, in this position, he felt like Jesper loomed over him like a dark cloud.  
"Have you touched yourself at all in the past week?" Jesper asked Kaz. He asked it as casually as he would ask what the weather was like, and Kaz didn't know if the heat that swelled under his skin was anger or embarrassment. 

Kaz knew if he opened his mouth he would stammer out some stupid reply, so he kept his mouth shut, instead choosing to glare daggers at Jesper.  
"I'll take that as a no." Jesper sighed, crossing his arms and leaning against the door. Kaz hated the way he immediately observed the way Jesper's biceps bulged when he crossed his arms.  
"You're disgusting." Kaz hissed.  
"Not sure whether that's an insult about being gay, or just me in general." Jesper replied. Kaz has never wanted to physically attack a person more.

Kaz didn't really know either. He didn't care that Jesper liked men, but it certainly bothered him that Jesper liked him. Kaz knew full well he had plenty of better options. Options that could love him back. Options that didn't cringe when hands touched them.  
"Why do you insist on doing this to me?" Kaz growled in a low tone. He didn't want anybody to hear them. 

Kaz didn't have anywhere to escape when Jesper advanced even closer, and he found in a horrified moment of being completely frozen that he didn't want to push Jesper away. When Jesper moved close to Kaz's ear, all Kaz could do was hope Jesper wouldn't touch him, while another part of him screamed for the opposite.  
"Do what?" Jesper whispered in his ear. A shiver went down his spine.  
"You know what you're doing." He whispered back. There was no bark behind his words; he didn't sound angry.  
"You like it." Jesper told him, unapologetic. Kaz depised the fact that he couldn't deny the claim.

There was a moment of silent tension before Jesper slowly made a move to grab Kaz's gloves off the counter. He didn't ask, but he knew Kaz saw what he was doing, and Kaz didn't stop him. 

Kaz watched Jesper slip the gloves over his slender fingers. Jesper could have been a good lockpick if he had ever bothered learning.  
"Tell me you want this." Jesper requested. Kaz resented the softness in his voice; he hated being treated with softness. He never wanted to get comfortable with people being kind to him, because he knew that kindness was always going to be ripped away. 

Kaz looked into Jespers eyes for a long moment. Jespers eyes were steady with lust, and Kaz could only hope his own didn't look the same.  
"I..." he paused, almost unable to form the words. It appeared that all the blood from his brain had migrated elsewhere. "I want..." Kaz swallowed his pride. "I want this. I want you to touch me."  
"Good boy." Jesper cooed in his ear as the palm of his hand pressed against the front of Kaz's pants. He let out a quiet whimper; the noise flooded with want, need, and a good deal of fear. He was able to endure this touch, dulled through layers of fabric, but how much more could he take before he broke? Before he fainted? 

Jesper pushed his palm against the outline of Kaz's cock harder, and Kaz let out another embarassing whimper.  
"J-Jes-" he stuttered, barely registering that he was about to beg Jesper for more. He wanted to kick himself for submitting so easily.  
"Shh," Jesper shushed him. "You don't want the others to hear you, do you?"  
"No." Kaz whispered.  
"Okay, then be quiet." Jesper undid Kaz's belt in one swift motion, his button and zipper in another, and in just a few short seconds Kaz's underwear, and the bulge inside of it, were exposed. 

Jesper undid Kaz's waistcoat and the bottom five buttons on his shirt to expose his lower abdomen, while Kaz gripped the counter top so hard his fingers were going numb. He was terrified, panic coursed through his veins, but he was grounded, and painfully aware of how hard he was. His cock ached with the need to be touched. 

Jesper slipped two fingers under the waistband of his underwear, and pulled them down until his cock was exposed to the cold air. Kaz felt it go down just a bit, but then he looked down and saw how hard Jesper was through his pants, and he saw Jesper wearing his gloves. He felt like a wave of pure heat washed over him, and his cock swelled even more hard than it was before. He was sweating, and nervous, and he didn't want to look Jesper in the eyes, but he wanted his touch like it was worth thirty million kruge.

Jesper held his hand up to Kaz's mouth.  
"Spit." He instructed. Kaz spat into his hand, and gasped when Jesper wrapped his fingers around his dick. 

Kaz couldn't help but realize how much more gentle Jesper was being than last time. He hadn't even called him any names; which Kaz could not tell if he was disappointed in or not.  
"Fuck," Kaz whispered as he watched Jesper pump him. He contemplated being less cooperative, just so Jesper would scold him.  
"Look at me," Jesper ordered. 

Kaz thought that was a perfect opportunity. He considered stopping himself; he didn't want Jesper to know what he wanted. But he was desperate, and Jespers hand was good, but it wasn't enough. Kaz looked up at Jespers face, stared at his lips, his eyes, his nose- he thought about how hot Jesper looked, looming over him, his fingers wrapped around his cock. Kaz spat on his face. 

"You little- what the fuck, Kaz??" Jespers other hand reacted instinctively, flying up and letting his fingers wrap around Kaz's throat. "You're such a fucking brat, you know that? Ever heard of 'don't bite the hand that feeds'?" He demanded. He was squeezing his throat so hard Kaz was seeing stars, and he wasn't treating his cock any gentler. Only when Kaz let out a choked moan, and his eyes rolled back did Jesper realize that this was what Kaz wanted.  
"Saints, Kaz," he muttered, squeezing and releasing Kaz's throat rhythmically, "if you wanted me to hurt you, you could have asked." 

Kaz couldn't have asked. Never in a million years would he have allowed himself to ask for such a thing. He felt himself slipping, the pressure on his throat becoming too much, but Jesper made sure to hold him up.  
"Jes?" Kaz murmured, almost sounding dazed. Jesper gave his cock a squeeze, and Kaz let out a whimper.  
"What?" He asked.  
"Can- can you..." Kaz almost couldn't bring himself to ask. The idea disgusted him, it horrified him to his core, but he wanted it so badly. If he kept thinking about it he'd cum, and he didn't want to get off without at least asking. "Can you use your mouth?"

Jesper stopped short, no longer squeezing Kaz's throat and just barely jerking him off. Kaz whined and bucked his hips, but Jesper didn't respond to the demand.  
"You sure?" He asked. Kaz nodded.  
"I wouldn't ask if I wasn't sure. Do you think I'm stupid? Do you not trust my judgment?" Kaz demanded, but whimpered when Jesper flicked the head of his cock.  
"Who's getting who off here again?" Jesper asked rhetorically, looking down at Kaz's throbbing cock. 

Kaz almost regretted asking, as Jesper seemed to completely ignore his question in favour of giving him soft, gentle strokes.  
"Yeah, I'll use my mouth," Jesper finally decided. "But you have to return the favour." 

Kaz was relieved Jesper agreed, but it quickly deflated as he processed the terms.  
"Jesper- I- I can't- I-"  
"Hey, hey- Kaz, you don't have to use your mouth," Jesper clarified, grabbing Kaz's chin, forcing him to look at him. Kaz recoiled at the contact, but let Jespers hand stay there. All his other senses were dulled as he desperately wanted Jesper to suck him off. "I just want you to get me off. Can you do that for me?"

Kaz didn't know if he could. He didn't know if he could handle the skin on skin contact, and he definitely didn't know if he was even capable of making Jesper cum.  
"I... I'll try," Kaz agreed, desperate for the feel of Jespers throat around his cock.  
"Good boy, now, if I'm going to suck you off you have to be quiet for me, can you do that?"  
"Yes." Kaz agreed, equally annoyed and aroused by Jesper talking to him like he was stupid. 

Jesper dropped to his knees. Kaz sucked in a sharp breath as Jesper's tongue licked the head,  
"Glove," Kaz gasped, holding his hand out in demand. "Give me one of the gloves." 

Jesper complied, taking the glove of his non-dominant hand off and handing it to Kaz, who yanked it on as fast as humanly possible. 

Jesper took the head of Kaz's cock in his mouth while Kaz gripped his hair with his gloved hand.  
"Fuck, Jesper-" Kaz moaned, almost unable to handle the sight of Jesper sucking on his head. He hadn't realized how much better it would feel than his hand, and how beautiful Jesper would look as he looked up through his eyelashes, right into Kaz's eyes. 

Jesper's mouth felt incredible, and Kaz couldn't handle only getting his head stimulated. He pulled Jesper's hair, pulling him forward until he gagged. Jesper pulled back, but Kaz pulled him forward harder, earning a whimper and a choking noise as Jesper's throat convulsed around his cock.  
"Like choking on my dick?" Kaz teased. Jesper glared at him, and Kaz had a very quick surge of fear that Jesper was going to bite him. He didn't, but Kaz still let go of his hair in panic. 

Jesper pulled off his cock with a popping sound, and glared up at him furiously. Kaz just smiled down at him.  
"You could have warned me before you choked me." Jesper spat. Kaz grabbed Jespers hair and yanked him forward, forcing his cock back into his mouth. "But where's the fun in that? Now suck."

Kaz wasn't very good at keeping quiet, and everytime he made a noise a bit too loud Jesper would pinch his thigh. But everytime Jesper pinched him, Kaz would shove his dick to the back of his throat, effectively turning the blowjob into a physical fight.

Jesper got tired of being pushed around eventually. Kaz knew he would. He grabbed the gloved hand from his hair and forced it against the counter, holding Kaz's hand down with enough force for him to not be able to move it. Kaz struggled, but Jesper knew he wouldn't touch him with his other hand. He used the time that Kaz was restrained to lick the vein on the underside of Kaz's cock, making Kaz's legs shake in response.

Kaz clamped his gloveless hand over his own mouth as Jesper put his tongue to use.  
"Jes- Jesper if you keep- there I'm gonna-" he cut himself off, putting his hand back over his mouth to stiffle another moan.  
"You better not cum until I say you can," Jesper threatened before digging his tongue into the tip.  
"I-I won't, I promise- fuck-"  
"If you cum before I let you I'm never getting you off again, do you hear me, you little bitch?"  
"Yes- I understand- I- ah-" Kaz's eyes shut tight, and he found himself trying to squirm away from Jespers mouth. He wanted to cum, but he wanted to do as Jesper said even more.

Jesper pumped the base of Kaz's cock while bobbing his head on everything else, and Kaz thought he might go insane if he didn't cum soon.  
"Jes- please let me cum- I want it so bad, fuck- please-" Kaz begged, forcing himself to keep a hushed tone. Jesper smiled at him around his cock, and pulled off to say, "cum for me."

Kaz wriggled his gloved hand free and grabbed a fistful of Jespers hair. Kaz stared at him, waiting for signs of protest, but there were none. Jesper let Kaz push his cock into his mouth, and he let him fuck his throat until he was cumming, face-fucking Jesper through his orgasm and loving the way he gagged. 

Kaz realized he was in far too deep when his orgasm ended, and he felt bad for how rough he had been with Jesper's mouth. Kaz never felt bad. He let go Of Jesper's hair, and he immediately pulled back and started coughing.  
"Uh... sorry." Kaz awkwardly apologized. Jesper side-eyed him, then laughed through his coughs.  
"Never thought I'd hear you say those words," he wreched. "Has Kaz Dirtyhands Brekker gone soft on me?"  
"Fine, forget I said anything!" Kaz spat defensively. Jesper slowly stood up off the floor. Kaz didn't look at him when he was standing, so Jesper grabbed his chin and forced him to. 

Kaz was a lot more resistant to Jesper's touch when he wasn't desperate for an orgasm. He jerked his head away, glaring at Jesper once his shock passed over.  
"Don't touch me." He snapped.  
"You haven't held up your end of the bargain, sweetheart." Jesper told him as he pulled his hard cock out of his pants. 

Kaz refused to look down. He didn't want to look at it. He spat in his hand, and nervously started jerking Jesper off, refusing to look at anything but his face.  
"Kaz, you're looking at me like I'm holding a gun to your head." Jesper told him, although his words came out a bit shaky as Kaz touched him. 

Kaz hadn't realized his facial expression mattered. He softened it a bit, which felt unnatural at the best of times- but now? It made him feel vulnerable. And not in a good way. Now that his head was clear, he could really think; what the fuck am I doing?

Jerking Jesper off wasn't as nerve-wracking as he expected it to be. It was awkward, and his refusal to look at what he was doing made it a bit more difficult, but he didn't hate it. He liked the way Jesper's face twisted as he tried to keep quiet.

Jesper came with a wobbly groan, having to reach forward and hold onto the countertop on both sides of Kaz so he wouldn't collapse. Kaz leaned back on instinct, but Jesper didn't touch him. Droplets of cum splattered on Kaz's abdomen and his dick, but he barely paid any attention. 

Jesper caught his breath next to Kaz's ear, and Kaz gave him to the count of three before he put his hands on his chest and shoved him back.  
"Okay, we're done, give me my glove back." He demanded.  
"Oh, Kaz. Ever the charmer." Jesper uttered sarcastically, peeling off the glove and tossing it to Kaz.  
"Thank you." Kaz muttered.  
"For what?"  
"The glove." Kaz immediately replied. It wasn't for the glove. 

Kaz considered asking Jesper to kiss him as they both tucked themselves back into their pants and Kaz cleaned the cum off of his abdomen, but he didn't. His feelings about Jesper were already confusing; he didn't know what would happen if he kissed him a second time.

Kaz watched Jesper leave the bathroom, and almost called for him to come back. But he didn't. He washed his gloves in the sink, and sighed as he put on the now damp material. Those gloves had been washed more in one week than they had in the entire time he'd owned them.


	3. Don't Make Me Change My Mind.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It was two in the morning, and they were desperate.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hee hoo porn

Jesper had never been bold enough, or stupid enough, for that matter, to attempt sneaking into Kaz's room in the middle of the night, but there's a first time for everything, right?

Kaz had been a royal cunt to anything and everything in his path today. Jesper even witnessed Kaz smash the back off a chair with his cane. (Saints know why. If he was so upset by the chair, why didn't he just move it?) 

Kaz's door was locked. Maybe it was because Jesper's mind had been clouded by his attempt to be quiet as he made his way up the stairs, but he hadn't even considered that Kaz would lock his door at night. He didn't know why he never considered this, as everyone else in the Slat slept with their doors locked. Jesper may have contemplated admitting to himself that the decision for his journey to Kaz's room had been made with the wrong head.

Jesper was no good at picking locks. He knew Kaz had tried to show him how before, but he hadn't paid much attention. He was too busy looking at Kaz's hands.

He weighed his options. He could just shoot the door handle off, but that... probably wouldn't bring him any of the attention he was looking for. Kaz may never touch him again if he did that. Jesper is fully aware of Kaz's need for discretion, and shooting at his door at two in the morning likely didn't fit his standards. 

Jesper really, really did not want to knock. He was scared others would hear, and he was even more scared of what Kaz would do to him if anyone heard and asked questions.

He knew Kaz was probably awake. That man never slept, as far as he could tell. There was a very soft glow coming from underneath the door, likely from a lamp, further cementing Jespers theory that Kaz was awake. 

Jesper searched his pockets for any kind of paper, and discovered a receipt for a scone at a bakery from a few days ago. Had he really been rewearing his pants that long? He made a mental note to do his laundry, (or, ask someone else to do it for him,) and slipped the receipt under the door.

He didn't have a pen to write anything on the receipt with, so he just hoped Kaz would be confused enough to open the door. Predictably, he was.

The door opened, slowly and quietly, and Kaz handed him back the receipt through the 8 inch crack in the door.  
"You dropped this." He said, then attempted to close the door in Jespers face.  
"Wait, Kaz-" Jesper put his hand on the door, while Kaz continued trying to push it shut. Kaz was strong; but so was Jesper.  
"What the hell do you want?" Kaz hissed, still trying to close the door. Jesper rolled his eyes and forced the door open, making Kaz back up in surprise as he walked into the room. 

The first thing Jesper took notice of was that Kaz was in his pajamas. He wore flannel pants, a baggy, black t-shirt, and his feet were bare.  
"You're not wearing a suit." Jesper noted.  
"Did you think I slept in my day clothes?"  
"Yeah." Jesper replied. Kaz rolled his eyes. "Besides, it isn't like you were sleeping."  
"You don't know that." Kaz scoffed defensively.  
"Your lamp is on. Unless you're afraid of the dark, I doubt you were sleeping."  
"What do you want, Jesper?" Kaz sighed.

Jesper looked Kaz over slowly, and reveled in the way Kaz shifted with discomfort under his gaze.  
"You know what I want." He told him. Kaz frowned.  
"It's two in the morning." Kaz replied, as if Jesper didn't know.  
"And?"  
"Couldn't you have picked any other time?" Kaz complained. Jesper smirked. 

Picking up on the fact that Kaz didn't really like saying yes wasn't hard. What made it difficult was deciphering what actually meant yes, and what didn't. Jesper was pretty sure Kaz complaining about the time was a yes. If he didn't plan on immediately kicking Jesper out and returning to his work, why would he care that it was late?

Kaz watched as Jesper closed the door behind him.  
"You made Wylan cry today, you know." Jesper told him as he locked the door. Kaz's expression didn't waver; he glared at Jesper, his face cruel and cold. Jesper didn't think he'd ever get used to the devilish features on Kaz's face.  
"So?"  
"So? Why do you have to be an asshole to everyone?"  
"He made a mistake that could have costed me." 

Jesper backhanded him. Kaz didn't make a sound, but it definitely wiped the glare off of his face.  
"What the fuck, Jesper?"  
"Sit." Jesper directed, pointing at the bed. 

Kaz didn't do as he was told, and Jesper didn't want to waste any time convincing him.

His fingers wrapped around Kaz's throat tightly, earning a choked gasp as he shoved Kaz by his neck towards the bed. Kaz grabbed at his wrist, trying to push his hand away, but Jesper batted his hands away with ease. Only when his legs hit the bedframe and Kaz fell into a sitting position did Jesper let go. Kaz immediately kicked him in the ankle with his good leg.  
"Keep your dirty hands off of me." Kaz barked. Jesper reached for Kaz's crotch, but his hand was hit away.  
"T-the gloves," Kaz stammered, leaping to back away. "You're not wearing the gloves."  
"Yeah? Neither are you." Jesper observed, looking at Kaz's bare hands.  
"They're on the desk." Kaz pointed towards them.  
"Okay." Jesper nodded, and grabbed them in all of three seconds. "Sweetheart, if you hit me again I'm going to tie your hands behind your back."  
"You wouldn't." Kaz challenged. Jesper smirked at him.  
"Oh, I would. And it may come in handy, considering what I'm about to do to you." 

Jesper slipped on the gloves, Kaz watching him with fear and anticipation.  
"What are you going to do to me?" He finally asked.  
"Oh, you'll see." He replied vaguely. "Now take your cock out for me." 

Kaz watched Jesper like a hawk as he reached into his pajama bottoms and pulled out his already half-hard cock.  
"Good boy," Jesper praised, making Kaz flush pink. "Touch yourself for me."  
"What?" Kaz demanded.  
"You heard me. Make yourself cum."  
"Are you not going to touch me at all?" He asked desperately. Jesper was pretty sure the only time Kaz ever got off was when he was with Jesper.  
"Oh, I'll touch you, but you have to do it the first time."  
"The first time??"  
"Kaz, do you want to cum or not? Because I'm not touching you until I see you make yourself cum."  
"If you're just going to make me masturbate, I could do it without you!"  
"Fine, go ahead." 

Jesper turned to leave the room, and made it to the door before Kaz's voice stopped him.  
"Jes- wait-" he called. Jesper turned around and watched him expectantly. Kaz stared back at him, and when Jesper started to turn around again, he reluctantly started stroking himself.

Kaz's movements were staggered and unsteady, making him look like he had no idea what he was doing. He doesn't have any idea what he's doing, Jesper reminded himself. As far as he could tell, Kaz doesn't masturbate. 

Kaz wouldn't look at Jesper. He focused on the floor, silently, although occasionally his face twisted like he had done something wrong.  
"Saints, Kaz. You really never have touched yourself, have you?"  
"Unlike you, I have self control." Kaz muttered.  
"Uh-huh, sure. Do it faster." 

Kaz did as he was told.  
"Spit in your hand." Jesper instructed. Kaz looked up briefly to glare at him, but still raised his hand to his mouth and spat into his palm. "Good boy," Jesper praised him.  
"Call me that again and I'll stab you." Kaz muttered, returning his now spit covered hand to his hard cock.  
"Threaten me again and I won't let you cum." Jesper returned. 

Kaz jerked himself off faster when Jesper threatened to not let him cum. His thin, lockpick fingers worked around his cock in quick, although still a bit awkward strokes. 

Jesper spotted Kaz's cane leaning against the desk, and didn't hesitate to pick it up.  
"Don't touch that." Kaz growled. Jesper held the cane by the crows head as Kaz glared at him, moving the end of the cane underneath his chin in one swift motion. He pushed hard enough to make Kaz look at him.  
"You ever made yourself cum before?" He asked.  
"Of course I have!" Kaz tried to growl, but Jesper moved quickly, hitting his thigh with the cane, and his words came out as a whine.  
"I don't believe you," Jesper told him. He tried weaseling the cane between Kaz's thighs, but he closed them together tightly.  
"Open your legs, Kaz." 

Kaz didn't respond, nor did he open his legs. Jesper didn't want to waste time on the game of getting Kaz to stop being a prude, so he took the easiest route. He slammed the cane against Kaz's wrist, making him let out a whimper, his hand dropping away from his cock in pain and surprise. He tried to reach for his dick with his other hand, but Jesper blocked it with the cane.  
"J-Jes-" Kaz tried, but he cut himself off with a painful gasp. Jesper had pressed the cane against the head of his cock, trapping it against his stomach, and he was putting enough pressure on it to make sure it was painful. In the dim light, he swore he saw tears glint in Kaz's eyes, but he must be hallucinating. He didn't believe for a second he was capable of making Kaz Brekker cry. 

"Are you gonna open your legs for me?" He demanded, pushing on Kaz's cock harder.  
"Y-yes! Yes, Jesper- it hurts, please- I'll do anything," he begged, trying his best to muffle his sobs by putting his hand over his mouth. To prove his point, Kaz tore his legs apart, spreading them as wide as they would go.  
"These," Jesper said, taking the cane away from Kaz's throbbing dick and nudging his pants, "need to come off."

Kaz was so relieved Jesper was no longer torturing his dick, he almost didn't process his words.  
"What?"  
"Take your pants off. I wanna see your pretty thighs." 

Kaz almost refused, but when Jesper saw the first sign of defiance, he found himself moving the cane back towards Kaz's cock.  
"No- no, I'll take them off- I'll take them off!" Kaz insisted, tearing his bottoms off just to avoid the cane again. Who knew Kaz wouldn't be able to handle something as simple as a bit of pain?

Jesper took notice of how his own cock ached inside his pants when Kaz dropped his to the ground. Kaz's cock was still out, hard and leaking, and Jesper started to palm himself through his pants.  
"Underwear too," he instructed, slipping his hand under his waistband to palm himself through his underwear. 

Kaz paused, spared a glance at the cane, then peeled his boxers off and discarded them off to some corner of the room.  
"What now?" He asked quietly.  
"Get yourself off. Don't make me repeat myself."

Kaz's hand returned to his cock, and Jesper couldn't take it anymore. He pulled himself out, exposing his erection to Kaz, as he was eye level with his dick.  
"You look so pretty when you touch yourself," Jesper commented, stroking his own cock to the sight of Kaz.  
"Fuck off," Kaz muttered, averting his eyes as he flushed a darker shade of red.  
"You better be nice to me, or I'm gonna shove my cock down your throat and make you gag." 

Kaz pumped himself faster. His eyes darted between Jespers face and his dick, and he spread his legs far wider than Jesper had even realized he was capable of.  
"You like that, huh?" Jesper noted. "You want me to fuck your throat?"  
Kaz shook his head slowly. Maybe he just liked being threatened.  
"You gonna cum soon, bitch?"  
"Y-yes, yes- I'm so fucking hard for you, Jesper." Kaz whimpered.  
"Yeah?" Jesper reached forward, taking Kaz's jaw in his hand. "You have such a pretty face. Open your mouth for me."

Kaz was too hard and too desperate to cum to think about what he was doing. His mouth opened easily, and Jesper pressed his index and middle finger inside.  
"Suck." He demanded. For a moment Kaz grimaced and looked like he was going to pull back, but Jesper wouldn't let him. He let go of his cock in favour of holding the back of Kaz's head, making him unable to pull away.  
"Come on, I know you love it," Jesper teased, rubbing his fingers on Kaz's tongue as he gagged around them. "You love it when I make you gag, you little faggot."

Kaz's teeth clenched down, and Jesper yelped in surprise. He made a reflexive attempt to withdraw his fingers, but Kaz's bite was firm. Only when Jesper heard the moans escaping Kaz's throat and looked down at the way Kaz was bucking up into his hand did he realize what was happening.  
"Being called a faggot makes you cum, huh?" Jesper laughed. Kaz desperately nodded as he finally let go of Jesper's fingers.

Kaz looked so cute post-orgasm, his hair a mess, his face flushed, his chest rising and falling as he attempted to catch his breath- Jesper almost felt bad about what he was going to do. Almost.

It happened too fast for Kaz to stop it in his dazed state. Jespers fingers wrapped around his still hard, but infinitely more sensitive cock. He was pumping him furiously, so fast Kaz barely even registered what was happening. Until he could feel it.

"Ah- Jesper, stop! Stop, no- fuck, fuck- please- it's so sensitive!" He cried as he squirmed, desperately trying to wriggle away from Jesper. He fell backwards on the bed and attempted to crawl back, but Jesper kept his cock in hand, rubbing the head mercilessly as he climbed on top of Kaz.  
"I told you I'd touch you, didn't I?" Jesper teased, squeezing the base of Kaz's cock with one hand and rubbing his open palm on the tip with the other.  
"I didn't want it like this!" He wailed, trying to buck Jesper off. But Jesper straddled his legs steadily, and no amount of kicking would get him off anytime soon.  
"Fuck, you're so fucking hot when you scream like that," Jesper told him. He couldn't take just using his hands anymore; he wanted Kaz's sensitive cock in his mouth.

Jesper wasn't quite sure how he would go about such an act. He sincerely doubted Kaz would appreciate being pinned down, and might start actually fighting against him. Kaz's squirming was playful. He knew that if Kaz really want to stop him, he'd have done it by now. 

"I'm gonna put it in my mouth, you better not fucking kick me." Jesper hissed. Kaz whimpered in reply, and went limp as he stopped squirming. 

Kaz recoiled when Jesper's tongue touched the head of his dick.  
"Easy," Jesper cooed. "It'll get better in a few minutes, I promise."  
"I can't cum again." Kaz deadpanned.  
"Oh, darling, I wasn't giving you a choice."

Jesper grabbed Kaz's legs by the back of his knees and pushed them apart, earning an annoyed grunt from Kaz.  
"Do you really have to do that?" He complained.  
"Shut up or I'll fuck you raw." 

Jesper didn't expect Kaz to physically put a hand over his own mouth, but wasn't upset when he did. He held Kaz by his hips and took the head of his cock in his mouth. 

Jesper almost froze when Kaz put his hand on his shoulder, convinced he must be dreaming. Kaz was touching him, willingly, and unnecessarily. He sunk down until half the length was in his mouth, earning a muffled whine from Kaz. He may have been sensitive, but he was still hard. Jesper began to bob his head, both hoping for and terrified that Kaz would grab his hair and force him down on the whole length. 

Jesper found himself grinding his hips down on the mattress, desperate for some kind of release. He's taking notice of the pattern in which his own cock is often neglected, and he wasn't very happy about it, to say the least. 

Kaz whined when Jesper moved his head up until only the tip was in his mouth, and Jesper could tell how hard Kaz was fighting not to squirm when he wrapped his hand around the base and started to pump him so fast his hand was almost blurry.  
"J-Jes- if you- if-" Kaz tried, but cut himself off by biting his hand to muffle the sounds coming out of his mouth. 

Jesper was surprised Kaz came again so fast, but he brushed it off like he knew it would happen.

Jesper hadn't seen Kaz cum this hard before. His whole body trembled, sobs and moans left his mouth and the words that spilled out were so unfiltered Jesper worried Kaz would kill him for hearing them. Sentences strung out of his ramblings, phrases like 'thank you' and 'it's so fucking good' rattled Jesper to the core, and he swallowed the newfound bitterness in his mouth.

Kaz didn't wait to catch his breath before he moved away from Jesper.  
"Told you I'd make you cum again." Jesper shrugged, pretending not to be hurt by the way Kaz practically struggled to get away from him. He didn't try to get him to stay; he had done what was asked, and Jesper expected no more. 

Kaz looked away while Jesper got himself off. Jesper pretended not to notice.

Kaz climbed out of the bed and made his way to the water basin. He took a damp cloth and threw it at Jesper, and stiffled a snicker when it hit him in the face.

They cleaned themselves in silence. Kaz located his underwear and pants, and Jesper watched him get dressed. Kaz either didn't notice, or didn't care. Jesper hoped it was the latter. 

Kaz hadn't asked Jesper to leave yet. Jesper found that he had begun shrinking in on himself, lying completely still, as if if he could stay still enough, Kaz would forget he was there.

Kaz returned to the bed after he had dressed himself, lying down delicately close to the edge, most likely to put as much space between him and Jesper as possible.

Kaz looked like he was close to falling asleep, but Jesper couldn't take the silence.  
"Do you want me to leave?" Jesper asked. The question burned as it ate its way up his throat. Had Kaz truly forgotten he was there? What game was he trying to play?  
"Did I say I wanted you to leave?" Kaz returned, sighing and turning on his side, facing Jesper.  
"Well, no-"  
"Don't make me change my mind, then."

Jesper had slept in the same room as Kaz before. But they were never alone, and they were never in the same bed. He felt his palms get sweaty just thinking about it.  
"You sure?" He pressed. He couldn't believe Kaz was letting him stay.  
"I wouldn't have said it if I wasn't sure," Kaz mumbled, sleep evident in his gravelly voice. "Just don't touch me, and don't wake me up." 

Just like that, Kaz was asleep. Or, maybe he was just good at pretending to be asleep. His black hair spread over the pillows like an oil spill, and all Jesper wanted to do was reach out and run his fingers through it. He didn't, but it was a nice thought.


	4. You're Right Where I Left You

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this is long and I didn't spell check it so uh ya know

Kaz didn't sleep very well that night. He never slept well with somebody else in the room, even if that someone was just Jesper. 

He fell asleep easily, but he barely dozed, and he would find his eyes shooting open every ten minutes, frantically making sure Jesper was in the same place he was the last time Kaz opened his eyes. 

Kaz was awake before Jesper. Sunlight dulled by clouds came in through the window, lighting up the room in hues of grey. He thought about waking Jesper up but decided against it. 

Kaz tried to ease the panic growing in his throat by reassuring himself that his encounters with Jesper didn't mean anything. They didn't mean he was gay, they didn't mean he liked Jesper, and they certainly didn't mean he was becoming soft. Still, it was dangerous. And it wasn't the kind of danger Kaz longed for. 

Letting Jesper touch him was like reaching into an open flame. It was stupid, it was dangerous, and there was no escaping getting burned. But, don't you want to know what it feels like? Letting the flames lick around your fingers, burning your skin with a touch so gentle yet so deadly. 

Kaz wondered if putting a loaded pistol in his mouth and pulling the trigger would be any easier than looking at Jesper lately. He guessed it wouldn't be. Because Kaz was afraid to die, and love and death have always been one and the same.

Jesper woke up when Kaz climbed out of bed. Saints, why had he let him spend the night? Had he somehow forgotten how much harder it would be to sneak Jesper out of his room in the daytime? 

"Kaz." Jesper mumbled tiredly, sounding surprised. Maybe he was surprised last night hadn't been a dream. Maybe he was surprised Kaz didn't put a bullet through his skull while he was sleeping.   
"Jesper." Kaz returned, trying to sound casual, but his voice came out strained. 

Kaz had decided that he hated Jesper. He hated Jesper, and he especially hated what the sight of him did to him. He wasn't supposed to get caught up in things like this- especially not with other men. Kaz hated being submissive almost as much as he loved it when Jesper overpowered him. He hadn't been this confused about something since he was a child watching magic tricks.

"How long have you been awake?" Jesper asked.   
"Not long," Kaz replied as he dug clean clothes out of his dresser. He didn't necessarily want to get dressed in front of Jesper, but he didn't want Jesper to think his presence was groundbreaking enough to disrupt any of his routines, either.   
"Did you sleep okay?"  
"Why do you care?" Kaz snapped, and refused to show he regretted it when Jesper's face fell.   
"I just-"   
"You just what?" Kaz interrupted, although it was clear he wasn't really asking. "Don't think that last night changed anything between us." 

It did. It changed everything. Kaz had let him sleep in his bed- he'd never let anyone sleep in his bed before. What was he thinking? How had he been stupid enough to let Jesper that close? He could handle the sex, but he didn't want Jesper any closer. He couldn't ever let him in. He'd ruin everything if he ever began to trust Jesper, especially the kind of trust that comes with sharing a bed for a night. 

"Kaz, it's half-past seven bells and you're already being a dick." Jesper muttered. Kaz could hear the hurt in his tone. Of course he could hear it, and he didn't want to care. He didn't want to care about Jesper, and he didn't want to care that his words could hurt him. It was Jesper's fault for being soft, right? Kaz couldn't help if everything he said cut Jesper to the core.   
"Sorry." Kaz grumbled, then wanted to kick himself. Seriously? He was apologizing now?

Kaz began to get dressed, and took notice of how Jesper watched him. His eyes raked over Kaz's body, making him fight not to shudder under his gaze.   
"You really have no shame, do you?" Kaz growled as he tied his tie in the mirror.  
"What should I be ashamed of?" Jesper asked. 

Kaz knew Jesper was daring him to say it, tempting him with the bait, but Kaz wasn't going to take it. He wouldn't sink that low. It forced the realization on him that not everybody was ashamed of the things he was, and he hated it. He should be ashamed, shouldn't he? Ashamed of the way he looked at the dip of Jesper's waist as he lied on the bed, the quilt pushed down enough to only cover his legs. Kaz looked at Jesper's hands, and he thought of all the wonderful things they could do, how his fingers looked clutching a gun. Kaz forced his gaze away from Jesper, back to the mirror. He could feel sweat trickle down his back as Jesper's eyes continued to bore into him.

"Give me my gloves." He requested, adjusting his tie in the mirror.   
"They're covered in cum." Jesper replied, so casually Kaz almost missed what the words meant.  
"Would you keep your voice down??" He hissed. "Saints, Jesper- have you no decency??"  
"You certainly didn't have any decency last night." Jesper replied, turning to lay on his back, tucking his hands underneath his head. Kaz wanted to kick him off the bed.   
"Don't bring that up to me." Kaz muttered, hoping that if he ignored how his face was becoming red, Jesper wouldn't notice.  
"No? Who should I bring it up to, then? I'm sure Nina would love to hear about it- oh, maybe Wylan. He'd love to hear about how easy it is to suck you into submission."  
"Shut up, Jesper." Kaz growled.   
"Maybe I should tell Inej-"   
"I said shut up!" Kaz bellowed. In one swift, thoughtless action he picked up his cane and hurled it at Jesper in a fit of immature rage. It smacked down on his hip with a distinct cracking noise before bouncing onto the floor. Jesper yelped when it hit him, but covered his mouth to silence any more sounds of pain. 

Kaz didn't want to hear about Inej. He felt guilty enough, even if they weren't dating. He knew she liked him, and he certainly knew he was supposed to like her. She was pretty, and she was... well, she was a she.

Kaz wondered if he had broken Jesper's hip, but quickly dismissed the thought. The throw had been too clumsy, too fueled by emotion rather than strength. It probably hurt like a bitch, but there's no way anything was broken. Kaz knew what bones sounded like when they broke. 

Kaz felt like he should apologize, but decided he had done enough apologizing for one day.   
"Oh, stop whining. It isn't that bad." He muttered. It might have been that bad- he didn't know. "It's not like it's broken. Besides, how many times have you been shot? Don't act like it's that bad."

Maybe dismissing Jesper's pain was the easiest way to make him feel better about what he had done. Kaz didn't know. 

He refused to look at Jesper again, instead returning his eyes to his reflection. He kept adjusting his tie, just to have something to do with his hands. Just to keep himself busy. It worked until Jesper appeared in the mirror behind him. 

Kaz only managed to get out "What are you-?" Before he felt Jesper's hand between his shoulder blades, and the dresser collide with his chest. He let out a small grunt- being shoved into a dresser wasn't exactly painless, but otherwise he remained silent, choosing to glare at Jesper's reflection. He shifted in discomfort, and had to spend a second reminding himself that Jesper's skin was not touching him. His shirt acted as a barrier. 

"You'd think you would have learned your lesson by now," Jesper tsked as Kaz struggled under his palm. Jesper pressed his crotch against Kaz's ass and ground against him, just enough for Kaz to feel that he was hard. Kaz acted on instinct alone; his good leg hooking around the back of Jespers and kicking forward, trying to knock him over. Jesper saw this coming, however. He held onto the dresser with his free hand, balancing his weight between the wood and Kaz's back to keep himself standing. Kaz groaned under the new pressure.   
"Behave yourself," Jesper barked.   
"Get your fucking hands off of me." Kaz returned. 

Jesper made a mistake. Kaz could handle being pinned to the dresser, he could handle Jesper grinding against him through their pants, but Jesper pushed a bit too far, challenged one boundary he shouldn't have. He grabbed Kaz's bare wrists with his bare hands, the feeling of skin on skin immediately setting off alarms in Kaz's brain. He started to panic. 

Kaz was normally good at keeping his fear silent, keeping it a secret. But when all his other buttons had been pressed this soon after waking up, it only took grabbing his wrists to push him too far. Jesper tried to hold Kaz's hands behind his back, but Kaz started thrashing violently, kicking backwards until he planted a lucky back-kick right on Jesper's thigh, sending him flying.

Maybe one apology for today wasn't enough.   
"Jes- Jes, are you okay?" Kaz frantically asked. Jesper wasn't used to hearing him frantic.   
"Yeah, I'm fine." Jesper replied, more stunned than anything. Kaz let out a sigh of relief that he hadn't hurt him, but the relief was quickly replaced with a sickly confusion. Why was he relieved? Why did he care if he had hurt Jesper or not?   
"I'm sorry." Kaz told him, and he hated that it was sincere. He leaned back against the dresser and took a few deep breaths, trying to get himself to stop shaking.   
"No- no, it's fine. It was my fault," Jesper told him, slowly standing up from where he had hit the floor. 

Kaz didn't confirm nor deny Jesper's statement. He didn't know if it was true, and he didn't plan on putting in the effort of thinking about it, which would be much more mentally taxing than he was willing to deal with at the moment. 

Kaz didn't know what to do. He could just kick Jesper out of his room; but then all this would be for nothing. And, although he wouldn't admit it to himself, or anyone for that matter, he didn't want to kick Jesper out. 

"I have a spare pair of gloves," Kaz said, surprising even himself with his words.   
"Oh," Jesper might have been almost as surprised as Kaz. "You still want to-?"   
"Don't." Kaz held up his hand to silence Jesper. "I don't want to talk about it. The gloves are in that drawer," he gestured to the top left drawer of the dresser. 

Kaz felt a surge of annoyance spark through him when Jesper opened his drawer and started digging through it, looking for the gloves. Then, he recalled he had told him to do so, and settled on averting his eyes. 

"Take your tie off." Jesper was right in front of him now, his hands gloved, his breath hot on Kaz's face.   
"Why?"   
"Fine," Jesper sighed. In one motion he undid Kaz's tie, and in another, he pulled it off of his neck.

Kaz didn't have time to ask questions before he was spun around by his shoulders and shoved down against the dresser. It hurt just as much the second time.   
"Fucking hell- a warning next time, maybe?" He grunted.  
"Shut up or I'll gag you." Jesper hissed. 

Jesper grabbed Kaz's wrists again, and he instinctively pulled back, but Jesper was persistent, and his hands were gloved. Kaz let him pull his arms behind his back, even as the rational side of his brain screamed that letting someone tie your hands behind your back was an awful idea. Jesper wrapped the tie around Kaz's wrists, tying them together in bindings that were snug, but not painful. He pulled against the restraints experimentally and found his hands really were bound. Jesper could do anything he wanted, and Kaz couldn't stop him. The thought terrified Kaz to his core, while simultaneously sending all the blood from his brain to his dick. He squirmed a bit at the discomfort of how tight his pants had gotten. 

Kaz wondered what exactly Jesper was planning on doing. He'd never had him bent over like this before. He contemplated asking, but decided it was unlikely for Jesper to tell him, anyway. Besides, he liked the fear that came along with not knowing.

Jesper's hands found the way between Kaz's legs, clumsily grabbing at the bulge in his pants and laughing when Kaz whined and tried pressing into his touch, only for Jesper to take his hand away.  
"You really are desperate, aren't you?" He chuckled. Kaz didn't reply, because he was desperate, and he'd rather kill himself than admit it.

Jesper grabbed Kaz by his hair and forced him to look at his reflection in the mirror. Kaz struggled against him slightly, but inevitably gave in and looked himself in the eyes. Kaz had fought Jesper so much this morning, he was too tired to do anymore. 

Kaz watched the way his eyebrows knit together and his mouth hung slightly open- Saints, was that really what he looked like? His face was dusted a light pink, and he was breathing so heavily he could see himself rising and falling in the reflection. 

"What are you going to do to me?" Kaz asked, too desperate to take it anymore. It was killing him; he wanted to know.   
"Haven't decided yet," Jesper admitted, pressing his crotch against Kaz's ass, who sucked in a sharp breath. "You feel that?" He asked.

Kaz did feel it. Of course he could feel it; it was like Jesper had an assault rifle in his pants.   
"You're disgusting." Kaz grumbled.   
"Oh, don't act so high and mighty," Jesper scoffed, reaching down between Kaz's legs and grabbing at his dick through his pants. "You're hard too." 

Kaz didn't know how much longer he could keep up the 'I'm straight and I hate this' facade. He was so hard his cock was throbbing, begging for any kind of release, and Jesper wasn't giving him any.   
"Jes, please." he whimpered. He just wanted to get off- Kaz could be bitter about the humiliation later. He saw his own face in the mirror; he was pouting. He looked like he was on the verge of tears.   
"Please what, Kaz?" Jesper taunted as he reached into his own pants and pulled his cock out. He let it rest on Kaz's ass; rubbing against his pants while Kaz struggled not to give in to his fight or flight response.  
"Make me cum." He whispered. He hated having to say it, and he hated having to look at his own reflection when he said it even more.   
"You want me to make you cum?" Jesper repeated, even though there's no way he had misheard Kaz. He loved making him say it.   
"Please, Jesper," Kaz begged. "I need it."  
"I don't know, Kaz." Jesper made a show of tucking his hands into his pockets, although he still rubbed his cock against Kaz. "I don't think you deserve it."

Kaz knew he didn't deserve it, but that's never stopped him. He's never been reduced to this before, though. He was used to taking what he wanted, killing anybody who got in his way; he's never had his wrists tied behind his back and been made to beg for what he wanted.   
"I'll do anything," Kaz groaned. He averted his eyes from the mirror. He didn't ever want to look at himself again. How could he be so desperate?   
"Anything?" Jesper repeated challengingly.  
"Yes, please-"  
"You better mean that." Jesper threatened. 

Kaz felt Jesper's fingers hook through his belt loops, and could only groan and Jesper pulled his pants down to his thighs.   
"I wanna fuck you so bad," Jesper muttered, hitting his cock against Kaz's ass. 

Kaz wondered what the fuck he had gotten himself into. He felt himself beginning to tense up; panic rising in his throat as he forcefully tried pushing it back down.  
"Then fuck me," he choked out, against every single cell in his body screaming for him to struggle out of his restraints and beat Jesper so badly he'd never consider coming near him again. Jesper stopped.  
"You sure?" He breathed hesitantly. He caressed Kaz's hip, moving his hand delicately down his back and stopping on his ass. Kaz resisted the urge to kick him.  
"Of course I'm fucking sure." Kaz barked.  
"We don't have lube." Jesper told him.   
"Don't you have any in your room?"  
"You'd be okay with me leaving you alone here while I got it?"  
"No shit I'd be okay with it. I don't need you to fucking watch over me like I'm some damsel in distress." 

The thought of being left alone with his hands tied and his pants around his thighs terrified Kaz, but he would never tell Jesper that. Everything about this terrified him. Being restrained, being submissive, being touched, being fucked- Kaz didn't know if he'd be able to handle it. All he could do was hope he didn't panic.

Jesper didn't reply. He gave Kaz a pat on the back, which quickly turned into his hand running down his spine, feeling each ridge with his fingertips.  
"I'll be back in a few minutes." He told Kaz, who pretended he didn't care.

Kaz came to the conclusion that he was not a patient man as the minutes he spent alone, bent over his dresser waiting for Jesper to return passed so slowly it could have been days. He squirmed a bit, attempting to get some kind of release by squeezing his thighs together, but it didn't really work. He wondered if Jesper was just going to leave him there; that that was his plan all along. He'd get Kaz to trust him enough to let him tie him up, then he'd excuse himself to get the lube and never come back, leaving Kaz to be discovered by somebody else. 

Kaz was all too aware that Jesper had left the door unlocked. Anybody could walk in and see him- it was terrifying, it was exhilarating, and it made Kaz so desperate for Jesper to come back and touch him he was close to tears. He'd never wanted anything so badly in his life. 

"You're right where I left you." Jesper said with surprise as he had opened the door. Kaz's head shot up, and he couldn't turn to look at Jesper, so he stared him down through the reflection in the mirror.  
"Close the fucking door before I break both your ankles." Kaz hissed, trying not to sound desperate. He really, really didn't want anyone finding out about this.   
"Yeah, yeah." Jesper waved his hand dismissively as he closed and locked the door behind him. "You still hard?"  
"Yeah." Kaz mumbled quietly. He avoided looking at his own reflection, and he avoided looking at Jesper.

Kaz heard Jesper drop to his knees behind him, his kneecaps making quite the noise against the hardwood floor.  
"What are you doing?" Kaz demanded.  
"Do you ever shut the fuck up?" Jesper returned, pulling Kaz's boxers down until they were around his thighs. Kaz gasped when he felt Jesper's lips against the head of his cock. 

Kaz's whole body pressed down; desperate for more. He let out a whine, louder than he intended and far more high-pitched than it was supposed to be. He didn't care; it barely even crossed his mind.  
"J-Jes, please-"   
"You get off on being desperate, don't you?" Jesper chuckled.

Kaz heard the sound of a bottle opening, then he felt two fingers against his hole. He instinctively moved to grab the dresser; wanting badly for anything to hold on to, but his wrists remained tied, and Kaz whimpered as Jesper pushed both fingers in to the first knuckle.  
"Say you're my whore." Jesper demanded. Kaz caught a glimpse of his own reflection and grimaced.  
"What?"  
"Say it."   
"Piss off."   
"Say it or I won't get you off. I'll leave you here for someone else to come find you." 

Kaz knew he should just swallow his pride and say it; he could feel Jespers breath against his dick, Jespers fingers pressed in and out, purposely missing the spot Kaz was trembling for him to touch.   
"I'm your whore." Kaz muttered bitterly. His voice was all ice, and Jesper knew he wasn't going to get any better than that.   
"Good boy, was that really so hard?" Jesper praised. He pushed his fingers into Kaz's prostate.

Kaz moaned and squirmed, his brain fully aware his wrists were bound but his body not quite as understanding.   
"Jesper, fuck me," Kaz begged. He was terrified, but want outweighed fear. He was scared it would hurt, scared he would panic from the contact, scared he wouldn't like it; but he wanted to know what it felt like. He wanted Jesper's cock inside of him.   
"Well, if you insist." Jesper said as he stood up from the floor. Kaz once again thought about kicking him, but he didn't. 

Kaz watched Jesper in the reflection as he reached forward. Kaz was about to ask what he was doing, but Jesper grabbed a fistful of his hair and forced his gaze to his own reflection.  
"I want you to see your pretty face while I fuck you." Jesper said in a low tone that made Kaz just as angry as it made his cock swell. He tried struggling against Jesper, but it was no use. He focused on his own face.

Jesper didn't give him any warning, (not that Kaz really expected one). He felt the tip of something a hell of a lot larger than fingers pressed against his hole, he felt Jesper pull his hair hard enough to make Kaz moan, and then he felt Jesper's cock pressing inside of him. 

Kaz watched his own face twist into a mix of shock and horror. His eyes went wide, his mouth hung open, he was redder than he ever thought he was capable of.   
"Fuck, slow down-" he whimpered.   
"Try to relax." Jesper said, running his free hand up and down Kaz's back in a way that would have been comforting, had Kaz enjoyed being comforted. 

Kaz must have tensed up a lot, because Jesper made a quiet noise of discomfort.   
"Saints, Kaz. If you don't loosen up I'm not gonna be able to fuck you." 

Kaz was trying. He was trying to relax, trying to take it without complaint; but Jesper's cock was huge, and just the half of it that was inside him made him feel like he was ripping at the seams.  
"It's fucking huge." He whispered.   
"Relax and it'll fit better." 

Jesper let go of Kaz's hair to grip both of his hips. He traced circles on his skin with his thumbs, and Kaz forced himself to breathe.  
"There you go, you're getting the hang of it." Jesper praised, pressing deeper inside. Kaz made a noise of discomfort, then a moan of pleasure; it didn't hurt anymore. (It never really hurt, but it wasn't exactly pleasant.)  
"You're great at taking dick."   
"Shut up and fuck me until I forget how much I hate you." Kaz hissed. Jesper was happy to oblige.

Jesper moved slowly at first, small, slow thrusts as Kaz got used to the intrusion; but whenever Kaz showed any sign of comfort with the new pace, Jesper would speed up, fucking him harder and faster, teasing him with drops of comfort and ripping it away almost as fast as he gave it. 

Kaz struggled to take Jesper's length, but he wasn't protesting, and that's really all Jesper cared about.   
"You take it so well for a virgin." Jesper cooed, running his fingers through Kaz's hair and fucking him deep enough Kaz could almost feel it in his stomach. Kaz wanted to protest; to insist he wasn't a virgin, but all that came out of his mouth were moans and sobs. 

Kaz was pushing back against Jesper with every thrust, still not used to the feeling and desperate to feel every single inch of Jesper's cock inside of him.   
"It's so good, Jesper," he groaned, tensing and relaxing his fingers as Jesper pounds into his prostate.   
"Yeah? Think you can cum without me touching you?"   
"N-no- no, please- touch my cock," Kaz begged.   
"You're cute when you beg," Jesper slapped his hand against Kaz's ass, making him yelp in surprise. "But if I touch you, you'll cum, and you're not allowed to cum too soon."   
"Please- please, I need it- I need it so fucking bad." Kaz pleaded. Tears were running down his face; whether from the humiliation or the pleasure, he wasn't quite sure.

All Kaz could do was push back into every single thrust, and pray to the saints he didn't believe in that that would be enough for release. That's all he wanted at this point; he wanted Jesper to keep fucking him, he wanted Jesper to touch him, he wanted to fucking cum.   
"Jes- please, if you jerk me off I'll let you cum inside me." Kaz declared, and tried to ignore the wave of shame that washed over him as he said it.   
"I was gonna do that anyways." Jesper shrugged, and laughed when Kaz weakly kicked his ankle. "You're losing your edge, Dirtyhands. Beg a little more and I might think about getting you off." 

Kaz felt heat begin to pool in his stomach. His eyes widened, realizing that he might not even have to beg Jesper to touch him.  
"Jesper," he said urgently. Jesper leaned down over him, his chest pressed to Kaz's back, pinning him to the dresser. He kissed the back of Kaz's neck.  
"Hm?" He hummed in Kaz's ear before biting him. Kaz let out a moan of approval.  
"Jes, I'm gonna cum." He whined.  
"Fuck, already?"   
"Yes- please, fuck- I love your cock so much," he sobbed. Kaz tried to press his face down against the dresser, but Jesper pulled him back by his hair, and he wasn't gentle about it.   
"Watch yourself cum, you little fag." He hissed in his ear. Kaz was beyond struggling; all he could do was watch his face as Jesper fucked him through his orgasm. He watched himself shake and sob and beg for more, and Jesper delivered. He kept fucking Kaz long after he had come; only giving in and pumping his cock after he had already released.

Kaz whined and sobbed; tears running down his face as Jesper overestimulated him, but all that did was make Jesper fuck him harder, pump his cock faster.   
"Fuck, Kaz, I'm gonna cum inside you." He groaned against Kaz's neck where he had been sucking on his skin.   
"Please," Kaz whimpered. "I want your cum inside me."   
"Whore." Jesper murmured. Kaz shuddered. 

Jesper fucked Kaz so hard his vision became spotty, groaning in his ear and pulling his hair as he came inside of him.  
"You're such a good boy," Jesper groaned. "You take it so well."   
"I love your cock." Kaz whispered. Jesper was still pumping him, and Kaz was too exhausted and fucked out to protest.   
"You're staying hard." Jesper observed.   
"Please don't make me cum again," Kaz whimpered. "I can't. I promise you, I can't."  
"You sure?" Jesper asked as he slowly pulled out. Kaz nodded.  
"I'm sure. Please untie me."   
"Yeah, yeah." Jesper said dismissively.

Jesper finally stopped pumping Kaz, who sighed in relief. He moved back a bit, his chest still pressed to Kaz's back, and pulled Kaz's underwear back up.   
"Oh-" Kaz gasped in surprise as something warm and sticky made contact with his dick. He hadn't realized that his cum had splattered into his underwear. "Jes- there- there's-" he stammered, almost embarrassed to tell him.   
"Oh, I know." Jesper said as he pulled up Kaz's pants. "You're gonna wear those the rest of the day."  
"What?"  
"Mhm. I think it'll be hot, making you walk around with cum in your pants all day."  
"You aren't serious." Kaz objected.  
"Oh, I'm serious, sweetheart. You deserve it."   
"I fucking hate you."   
"You really want to insult the guy who was about to untie you?" 

Kaz went quiet.   
"That's what I thought." Jesper chuckled, finally standing up. Kaz gasped in relief; he hadn't realized how much weight Jesper had been putting on him. Both of his arms were completely numb. 

When Jesper got Kaz's hands untied, Kaz started to slip off the dresser. His legs were too wobbly to hold himself up, and his arms were too numb to do anything about it. Jesper caught him by his armpits before he could hit the floor, thankfully.

Jesper lifted Kaz and shuffled him over to the bed, where he collapsed on his back, panting for breath.  
"You're so pretty, you know that?" Jesper told him quietly.   
"Don't get too friendly," Kaz grunted. "I still hate you."  
"Really? I recall you saying you love my-"  
"Your dick doesn't talk. Loving that is very different than loving you." Kaz hissed.  
"You're still hard, you know." Jesper told him.  
"Touch me and I'll kill you."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> please give me suggestions for more chapters because I am out of ideas


End file.
